Just in case you didn't know!

Guess where I am going? ENGLAND!!!!!!!!!!!

Lori's Blog:

Reading Lori's blog struck a nail. I remember as a child I held both positions. Depending what person I was at the time, I was either hiding and trying deeply to be unnoticed or I was striking out at whoever or whatever crossed my path. I live with tremendous sorrow for all those I have hurt either intentionally or unintentionally. To belong was everything, to appear normal was survival. No one could know the secret I hide, the shame I carried, the dreams that haunted me, but someone had to pay! I wanted to release the anger that consumed my every waking moment. I needed to lash out, to give someone else the pain!
When my friends and I picked on someone, called them names, riduculed them I was so relieved it was not me! that I went along with it, fully knowing in my heart, how much the other person was hurting, but I could not stop. When I would go home alone at night I would cry myself to sleep full of guilt and shame for my behaviour. You see I was that little girl once who was made fun of and riduculed, who was never picked for the team, who's clothes never quite reached the "in fashion" quota! Who lived on the wrong side of the track! The little girl who's family had to move every several months or year for one reason or other. Who's Mom would have black eyes and torn clothes. Who's house would have police officers knocking at their door every couple of weeks! Your probably asking yourself - how could you have treated someone else so cruelly? the only answer I have is I was just glad it was not me!!!!!!!!
There is a girl, Lori Connolly, to whom I owe an apology! For the past 39 years I have carried this guilt! If she is out there I want her to know how deeply, deeply sorrow I am . I want her to know it was never about her. There was nothing wrong with her, she just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time of my life. I pray that God has been good to her and she is happy. I pray that what I did or said, or what ever my friends did or said did not scare her for life. I pray that God healed her heart and she became all of what God had intended her to be. And I pray that God never lets me forget Lori! That I get reminded daily that people, are not always what they appear to be on the outside. That before I open my lips to speak or lash out at someone, I am reminded, of my experience as a child, and how it felt to be riduculed. I pray that I never forget how blessed I am each and every day, and that all our experiences are gifts of life!